5 ways farms get stuck - you’re ambivalent about your business
You use your lack of a clear decision to treat your farm as a business as an out for your own self-sabotage.
You really don't want to get burned if this "farming thing" doesn't work out.
And what would people say if you did fail? 😳
So if you don't try, it's OK if it doesn't turn out. You're not emotionally invested and you can't get hurt.
No big deal.
Wrong. This indecision is costing you dearly.
The protection racket you're running on yourself
Here's what's really happening: you're hedging your bets.
If you don't fully commit, you can't fully fail. If you keep one foot out the door, you have an escape route. If you never really try, you never have to face what happens if you give it your all and it still doesn't work.
It feels like self-protection. It feels smart, even. Why go all in on something that might not pan out?
But here's what you're not seeing: you're not protecting yourself from failure. You're guaranteeing it.
You're already failing
This may sound harsh, but it's time for some straight talk.
You think that by playing it small and safe, you're protecting yourself from future failure.
It's a lie. You've already resigned yourself to failure. You are failing right now.
Failing to value your products.
Failing to value your time.
Failing to value yourself.
You're not avoiding failure. You're just choosing a slow, quiet failure over a fast, visible one.
And the slow failure is worse. Because it drains you for years instead of teaching you something quickly.
What ambivalence actually looks like
Ambivalence isn't always obvious. It doesn't always feel like indecision. Sometimes it looks like:
Half-measures. You do some marketing, but not consistently. You raise prices a little, but not enough. You invest in the business, but only partway.
Escape hatches. You keep your off-farm job "just in case." You don't tell people about your farm because "it's not a real thing yet." You hold back from calling yourself a farmer or a business owner.
Waiting for certainty. You'll commit when you know it will work. You'll go all in when you have proof. You'll invest fully when the risk is gone.
But the certainty never comes. There is no proof until you do the thing. The risk is never gone.
So you wait. And wait. And nothing changes.
The anxiety underneath the calm
You try to put on a calm demeanor. "I'm just taking it slow." "I'm being careful." "I don't want to rush into anything."
But beneath the surface, you're anxious.
Because you know you're not really trying. You know you're holding back. You know that if this doesn't work, it might be because you never gave it a real shot.
And that's a terrible feeling to carry around.
The ambivalence isn't protecting you from anxiety. It's creating it.
What it's actually costing you
Time. Every year you spend in ambivalent limbo is a year you're not building something real. Time is the one resource you can't get back.
Money. Half-committed businesses still cost money. You're paying for inputs, equipment, markets — but not getting the return because you're not fully in.
Energy. The mental load of indecision is enormous. Carrying around the question "should I really do this?" is exhausting. It takes energy that could be going toward actually building something.
Opportunity. While you're hedging, other people are committing. Markets are filling up. Customer relationships are being built — by someone else.
Your sense of self. Every day you don't commit is a day you're telling yourself you don't believe in this. That chips away at your confidence, your identity, your belief that you can do hard things.
The question you need to answer
It's time to sh*t or get off the pot.
I know that's blunt. But you've been circling this question for too long.
Are you in or are you out?
Not "are you in if it works out." Not "are you in if you can figure out how to make it easy." Not "are you in eventually."
Are you in? Now? With the uncertainty and the risk and the possibility of failure?
Or are you out? Ready to let this go and stop pretending?
Both are valid choices. What's not valid is staying in the middle forever.
Why commitment is scary
Let's name it: commitment is scary because it means you could fail publicly.
Right now, you can fail quietly. Nobody really knows you were trying. If it doesn't work, you can just... stop. No embarrassment. No explanation required.
But if you commit? If you tell people? If you go all in?
Then failure is visible. Then people will know. Then you have to face what it means if you gave it everything and it still didn't work.
That's terrifying. I get it.
But here's what's on the other side of that fear: the possibility of actually succeeding.
You can't get to success through ambivalence. You can only get there through commitment.
How to break the cycle
Make a decision. In or out. Business or hobby. Commit or quit. Pick one and stop living in the uncomfortable middle.
Set a deadline. If you can't decide right now, give yourself a timeline. "I will decide by [date]." And then actually decide.
Tell someone. Accountability helps. Tell someone you trust that you're committing to this. Make it real by saying it out loud.
Burn a boat. Do something that makes it harder to back out. Invest in something. Commit to a market for the season. Make a decision that has stakes.
Accept that you might fail. And decide that's okay. Failure isn't the worst outcome. Never trying is.
How coaching helps
Sometimes just acknowledging you're ambivalent about your business is enough to get you unstuck. When you finally see how you're standing in the way of your own progress, it can spark the reckoning you need.
Coaching provides a neutral perspective and non-judgmental space to explore the thoughts and motivations that stall you from taking action — and uncover the courage to commit.
Because that's what this is really about: courage. The courage to try. The courage to fail. The courage to say "I'm doing this" and mean it.
That courage is already in you. Sometimes you just need help finding it.
The invitation
This week, try this:
Name it. Are you ambivalent about your business? Be honest with yourself. Write it down if you need to.
Ask why. What are you protecting yourself from? What's the fear underneath the indecision?
Pick a commitment. Just one. Something small but real. A market you'll commit to. A price you'll hold firm on. A decision you'll stop revisiting.
Tell someone. Make it real by saying it out loud to another person.
You've been standing at the edge for too long. It's time to jump.
Not because you're certain you'll land safely. But because staying on the edge forever isn't actually safe either.
It's just slow failure dressed up as caution.
Time to commit.
If this resonated, you might also want to read:
The energy drain of unmade decisions - Why indecision is exhausting you
You can't grow your farm business past who you're willing to become - The identity work underneath commitment
Why writing down your plan for next season feels scarier than it actually is - Fear of commitment and accountability
You’ve got this!
If you need support finding the courage to commit, I'm here. You can schedule a free chat with me anytime at FarmCoachKatia.com/work-with-me.